Bridezilla

Standard

So I was talking to cores last night about my plans to be a school psych. I was kinda a little stressed about the additional finances I will acrue in this endeavor even though I will be making twice the amount of money. Cores was great. He reminded me not to cut my self short and to do what I have to do to go to grad school. Here is how the finances would have worked (before I realized that school psych programs are usually at night which allow a teacher like moi to work full time or sub fulltime): $1500 /month (bills, rent, food, and zero fun) times 12= $18,000 / year . That’s how much I would of had to take out just to live if I couldn’t work. Then the cost of tuition, which could be from $10-20k depending on the state school…becuase I cannot afford another Jesuit education unless it will get me a better job then i’ll bite the bullet. So on the high end of the scale, me going back to school without working would cost me 38K a year in loans. Multiply that by the 3 years it takes to get a masters in school psych= $114,000 in loans. Add that to the current 60K I am currently accruing, and you get $174,000. You know, when you type out the zeros the number becomes a little more serious. God damn. And thank God i’ll be able to work for the most part.

So as I sit here and watch Bridezilla and people talk about how expensive their weddings are, I realize that I could cut costs in my financial future by simply not having a big ass wedding. I am sooooo getting married in vegas. At the very most I can have a kick ass wedding that includes me paying for the hotel rooms of my family members (which only 8 at the maximum will be in attendance) and the actual wedding, I will allocate like $3-5K. Note, no serious zeros. These women are spending like fucking $75,000. Note, serious zeros. Hmmmmm….take the projected cost of a wedding done right, $75,000, minus the cost of how I will do my wedding, at the most $5k, and I have fucking $70,000 to spend on my education. yes! And my parents have already agreed to attend if I get married in vegas! They love me!

Okay, so I know why some of you may be completely aghast by the potential costs of a wedding. Well lets say that it attributes to my level of expectation. Um, for one, if I were going to go all out (you know, Go big or go home) I would never have my reception in what looks to be like a fucking basketball court. Wood paneling floor with big doors that swing open and lighting that reminds you of sixth period gym class. I DON’T THINK SO. I think that the movie Father of the Bride ruined me for life, being that it was my first insight into how weddings should look. Or at least how high class weddings should look. It is forever my idea of what it means to Go big or Go home. No basket ball court reception for me…no sir. Fucking they erected a tent on the lawn. They had a lawn. Shit, I have yet to see a lawn in Los Angeles. Yeah, thank God I’m not looking to have that type of wedding. My wedding at the Aladdin or Venetian, or if I marry particulary well…and this will blow the whole aforementioned theory about being able to supplement the cost of my education by getting married in Vegas…the Bellagio or the Wynn, will consist of small, short, classic ceremony, and black jack. Mags gave me a card, and well, it will come in handy for the reception. The rehersal dinner will be pizza in my suite…not because I’m cheap but because I love pizza. And plan to give it up after I get married. Because unlike Britney, I do not plan to let it all go to shit when I get my man…one must always keep their eye on the prize of find a better man (I am just kidding! Hmph). The reception will occur around the black jack table, where the wedding party or myself, mags, and amanda will sit and play blackjack until we make enough money for the honeymoon. Honeymoon to where…New York…I don’t know, I already live in Los Angeles, and We’d be getting married in Vegas, so where else is there to go but NY. I’m putting way too much thought into this.

On the children tip, I am reminded of a time during college where my friends and I were watching the sound of music. My friend Chris wrote in his blog that I said I wanted to have seven children so that I could exploit them like the VonTrap children, and that was the only reason i wanted to have children. Lord…seven. Its funny, because I still feel that way. If Ihave any children they will be exploited for their talent and their cuteness and then sent to Aunt Shali’s house for some guidance. I’m glad to see I have friends who will remember me when I’m dead. Love it!

Hmmmmm…so you know how I’ve been concerned about how I haven’t been feeling hungry? All this talk about money is making me hungry. I’m not going to eat though. Because it is a visceral response to stress. And that is what we are trying to avoid. I cooked enough chicken to last me the week for lunches that have chicken salads and dinners that have black beans. Its good to see that I am being resourceful. And lazy. I am spending the evening reading my friends blog from start to finish. As in from 2001 until 2005. Love it!

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s