why has God stricken me so?


So we have this half ass cable…that only plays Oh!(oxygen) WE (women’s entertainmetn) Disney, home shopping, cspan, and a very fuzzy FX….oh, cbs and nbc…..its like a the Mom’s package on cable. There is nothing on except Living Single. I want to die.

Work has finally returned to normal…or at least my feelings at work. Ate lunch with Bean during the spanish club meeting. I showed him pictures of the fam, and he told me about how at one time he actually was so blind he wouldn’t be able to tell that I was black…he was joking…and followed that by saying “now i can see that you’re sexual chocolate.” My response, laugh, “shut up bean.” Awww yes, ladies and gentleman we have returned to our regularly scheduled program. Thank God. I can not run on over indulgent fantasies alone. I had the hardest time falling asleep and woke up early…the roommate attributes it to me being excited about going to work. Well with all the great things that have happened since friday night, why wouldn’t I be excited. Getting my LMU advisor to come and see me has become quite the difficulty. I only have six more weeks of teaching…bitch better try to get to see me. she’ll be coming out every week. WHOA!!!!!!! Kristie Alley has lost 50 pounds…..and she’s not a very fat actress any more…or so she says. she looks good. NOrmal. Have you ever seen that stupid chicken of the sea commercial with the girl in the belly showing shirt and the miniskirt. I’m sorry but aren’t we all a little too old to be wearing belly shirts in profesional settings. I don’t know…maybe I”m just used to a more laid back style where our midriffs are left on the beach or in the club.

sometimes .the roommate and i have these random roommate moments. Like lying at the top of the stairs talking about my day and her telling me that I’m lying about things return to normal because clearly they haven’t. this is how we know they haven’t….I told her that things have finally returned to normal, and she steps out of the bathroom and says “no they haven’t.” and i curl my hands over my face and say “shut up mollie” which usually means “fuck, you’re right” you know how i can tellshe’s right….i have never before stepped out of anyroom and made any type of proclamation. especially not in this house. christ.

i just finished talking to her mom, and ithink i inadvertantly invited her mother to come and see our new place. her mother politely withdrew, mentioning that once she gets moved into her new house, gets her parttime job, air line ticket prices drop, and gasoline prices drop—-then she’ll come out. by that time mols will be in new york. or berkely. or whereever she is going so that shals can move in. i don’t know if i’m bored, exhasuted, or depressed. i hate that they are such similar feelings that they most often signal the presence of all three. why don’t i have any good books to read.


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