So tonight was beth’s wedding celebration. Her and her husband ran off to Vegas at the end of October and got hitched in the LIttle White Wedding Chapel. As Beth would say, if its good enough for Britney its good enough for her. Beth is like the antithesis of Britney Spears…yet being the feminist she is, she’d rather love her then hate her. But I am getting off point.
In the past 15 minutes that I’ve been home I’ve come to two “startling” revelations:
1)Aside from Alex G., dating my roommate is like the worst thing you can do for our friendship. Because, I’m not going to like any guy she dates until she marries him….and if he’s anything like her friend Teal’s fiancee, I may not even like him then. Maybe my expectations are just too high…I don’t know. I have no idea what has brought on this sudden feeling of total judgement towards the guy she dates. Maybe its knowing that in about four to six months she’ll begin in with the questioning of if he’s right for her. I’d just prefer to start out on the foot of “He’s not good enough for you. He’s got some redeeming quality. Keep him around until those run out, and then cut him loose.” I’ve said those same words about every boyfriend she dated after Alex G, and I’m more then prepared to say them now about K and its only week 3. Its so new in the relationship that we’re still at the point where we dont’ even talk about it because I don’t want to hear it. We did the same thing with Sam. Its like she knows I disapprove in some way (they’re not good enough) and I will not hear about it until its absolutely necessary. And now that we don’t share a bathroom, it won’t be necessary for a good long time.
2). I believe in God, therefore I in turn believe in a such thing as a calling…things happening for a reason. I believe I am in complete control of the “board game” that is my life, and that I open it to the peices that fate puts in my path. my life is a board game…would you like to join me for a round? Anyway, its dawned on me tonight that it may just be my fate to be single until I have achieved in life the development that is the greatness of me. That makes no sense, so let me paint you a picture. I surround my self with friends who give off the aura of self knowledge and self confidence. They are accepting and loving towards themselves. They are conquering the world or are seemingly in complete awareness of their ability to do so if they should wish. Whatever haunts them or holds them back is simply apart of the back story that is being overcome on a daily basis, and is in fact miniscule in the grand comparison of their lives. I, on occasion, do not share this perseption about my life. There are things that I have left undone and unfulfilled that are apart of the greatness that is me…and by doing so I am denying others and myself the greatness that is me. At this party tonight I only knew four people: the bride and groom, Sam, and Meredith…make that five, I know Meredith’s boyfriend. but perusing the room alone I met alot of cool people, including a girl named Jemma and her cool fiancee Greg Baker. Here’s where the game board analogy and fate analogy works in….Jemma is an office manager who is an aspiring writer. We talked for a little bit and I confessed to her that I was in awe of her courage to pursue her dreams and creativity. She does so because it is apart of her, and to not do so would be killing her. It all sounds rather pretensious, but really was not. She’s very down to earth and very sweet. I told her about how I’ve always just put off that side of myself, and that I am determined to fulfill it and that after I graduate in may I want to enroll in the UCLA extension program. She did that same program and reassured me it was great. Long story short…I guess that saying is “to make a long story short” her and her fiancee were great people who were inspiring and inspired by me and sam, and I never would have met them had I not moved to LA, had I not loved my job, had I not had the balls to become friends with Beth who in turn invited me to her wedding party because I am one kick ass person. I have to say that I love this life and it fits me, and that its nights like tonight that make the saying “it will all happen when its suppose to happen” seem valid. It will happen when its suppose to happen as long as I participate fully in it all.
please note that participating fully tonight meant wearing a pair of white jeans from the gap that fit better then any pair of pants I have ever worn. Somewhere on this camera I have proof!