my goodness

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okay i never thought i’d type this but i am so tired of being in bed. or even in my bedroom. Mols is also home today and so she’s been kind enough to buy lysol so that we can disinfect this house and not enter a circle of being sick. how the hell do you get the stomach flu? I just don’t get it. The nice folks @4620 might also want to get some lysol being that I slept on your couch with your blankets this weekend. I’m just sayin. My body is even rejecting the 7up and antacids I took at 8 this morning. what the fuck. this is insane. I appreciate your care and concern, but i strongly suggest purchasing lysol and using a healthy dose of it if you were any where near me this past week. I’m just sayin.

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It’s almost 6pm, and I a)would seriously rather throw everything in this room away then wash it and b)am starting to feel a bit better. I made it through 4 hours of not wanting to die so I figure I will survive. Somebody cue Destiny’s Child. Here’s a picture of the pedialyte baby.

Speaking of crying babies, the new york times magazine is running this 12 page article about Choice Moms, women who are choosing to become single mothers through Artificial Insemination (which kind of reminds me of that Speilberg movie AI: Artificial Intelligence—long ass boring movie). Its impressive. The focus of the peice was on women over 35, who were career minded, and addressed all aspects of areas of concerns from insemination to guardianship of the child should something happen to the mother to “siblings.” It was really interesting. Alot of the women made this choice kind of out of a lack of options, being that primary option would be putting up with some man’s bullshit should she get pregnant and he get a)all angry, b) all controlling, or c)disappears. Its like “I’m not married, and I’m not going to wait for you to come around.” It makes sense to me. A good handful of my friends were raise in households headed by women, and they’re all extraordinary people. I even have friends who were raised in dual parent household who are pretty good people as well. But let me tell you about my uncle’s family, the only family in our extended family where the parents are still married: those kids are messed up. I don’t know if its because their mom just kept having baby after baby, or if life is that “difficult” being biracial, or if some mysdterious virus has penetrated the bubble of common sense and good choice making—but the three oldest kids are messed up. Which actually fits for the rest of our family. The oldest son moved out at 18, got some girl pregnant, admitted to trying crack (does anyone just “try” crack? Is that even possible?); the oldest daughter got pregnant by some little 50 cent wannabe long before 50cent even hit the scene. This ugly motherfucker…augh. I remember us all being 16 and she was all angst filled, and had big issues about some bullshit, had the underside of the back of her hair shaved off and parts of it dyed green (this is where I think there were some biracial issues), and was pregnant. fucking had two babies with this dude before leaving him. Funniest thing was when one time visiting her, the first baby was not getting his way, and so with perfect timing and with perfect pitch, he says “Bitch.” I shit you not, that is the only word that I’ve heard that baby say. Then there is the second youngest daughter who was like a perfect angel growing up but managed to turn 15 and became addicted to meth and shit. Got pregnant, had a baby, had the baby taken away from her to go live with her sister, all the while I can only wonder: what the fuck?! My mom blames it on the fact that my aunt just kept having babies instead of getting a job. I think something was more senister. but its certainly a case for why two parent households are not maybe the best. go with what you want, when you want it.

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