I started to write this entry on March 13, 2011. I couldn’t finish it because I couldn’t find the right words to capture what I felt about such an amazing experience. Here is part one:
Today has been a crazy new day! It just feels different. I feel different. I’ve been a funk most of the weekend. Not like a funk where you can feel it settling into your bones and it feels like a fog has set down over your brain. And not one of those “i’m in a bad mood” kind of funks. More like a “I am splayed out across my couch and cannot understand why I can’t do my homework” kind of moods. But not today! Today has been so different! Today was my first day of Impact Self Defense class! Holy crizzap. I have never felt my adrenaline rush like that. I don’t know what I expected, but I have to say that I haven’t been in such a supportive and empowering environment ever in my life. EVER. Its an incredibly well designed program. Its scenario based so we’re expected to fight at full force, no pulling punches, no being nice, no apologizing, just really fighting for your safety because if you don’t, who will? I swear for the first half of the class I could feel my shoulders hunched and I think I radiated a fearful energy because the 17 year old girl next me said, “Its okay. You can do it. Just pretend its someone you don’t like….” I looked a her and thought, “geeze, what must my face look like?” Maybe 17 year olds are really astute, but I was freaked out. Once I did it, I was in front of everyone defending myself and the instructors were really helpful in helping me with my technique, I couldn’t get my adrenaline to stop pumping. Everyone is yelling “NO!” or the moves (like “Groin! Pull!) with you so that you don’t stop yelling either. There was constant support from the many instructors present. Before each “fight” we huddled and did a “No” Circle, where we stomped three times to No for [enter personal cause here] example “let’s give three no’s against domestic violence.”
That is how far I got. I could not for the life of me describe what it was like to be in a fight (until tonight when I did a writing exercise about it). Below is a collection of my fights pieced together using AVS video editor (hence the water mark at minute 1 and minute 4). Fast forward through the first minute. Its just a picture. Note: This video is copyrighted to me and to impact personal safety. Don’t steal it! Don’t use any part of it.
I can’t wait for the Advanced Class!